Inasmuch as married couples declare undying love for one another, and their marriage relationship is healthy and maybe they are also sexually compatible, there is still a need for spouses to really hit pleasure line when sexually connected. But with the way couples go about life, attending to most of life crucial needs, hitting the pleasure line are areas couples often ignore to their own peril. But even though we are often caught up in the several activities that define our daily lives, we can’t afford to ignore the best sex has to offer.
Let’s see the several kinds of sexual pleasure lines spouses need to add to their list of discovery this weekend to re-energise their sexual life. Yes, it is when couples unite sexually that one can say that their marriage is really living! Recently, some British researchers asked 254 businessmen and women where they got their best and most creative ideas outside of the office. Their top five thinking zones are in the car, while socialising, while lazing around, in the toilet and after a good bout of lovemaking with their spouses. Whoa!
So, why limit your sexual experience, adventure and exploration to the same routine when there are lots of erotic, sensational and sensual sexual bouquets that you and your spouse could sample from?
This week, in my quest to re-energise your sex beds, I am going to suggest twenty special secrets that would certainly enliven your sexual taste and protect your marriage from the troubles that a sedentary sex life brings to couples.
- First, couples must dump the idea that great sex depends on great physical techniques. The joy of great sex is not only physical. Sure, the thing couples do to and with each other’s bodies feel good, but pleasure occurs in the brain, which means regardless of what’s happening down at those delicate nerves ending of the penis, scrotum, vagina clitoris and the inner thighs, your state of mind is everything.
Partners can master every move of their spouse (especially long time married lovers) or even new married lovers can master every move in our previous articles, but unless you perform them in a way that resonates in the control centre, it is just pointless caressing each other. It will only look like you both are just rubbing yourselves.
- Secondly, your physical look does not necessarily have to measure up to enjoy all pleasure lines and beyond. Harder and longer thrusting does not equate better but basic physical compatibility matters a lot.
- Bringing your lover to climax doesn’t mean you’ve hit a homerun. An orgasm can be as intense and powerful as the popping of a champagne cork or as flat as opening a bottle of soda that’s lost all its fizz. It’s much more about what you’re feeling when you feel the waves than how the waves make you feel. I need couples to bear in mind that the view from the mountain top may be breathtaking, but the exhilaration comes from the climb.
- Wives, please note that you do not have to be beautiful to be attractive. Unforgettable sex does not actually depend on a perfect flat stomach, buttocks, breast, and vagina, or well defined six packs for men. When both of you radiate love, it’s light that gives off a brilliant glow and this determines how your spouse sees you during sex.
- Spouses must learn how to read their partner’s moods, this is by far the greatest pleasure line enhancer. It puts both of you in the same wavelength. It requires tuning in completely to your spouse’s emotional state and focusing on giving him or her emotional pleasure along with the physical breathtaking pleasure.
This entails knowing when to stop and when to keep going. Knowing when to change position to his or her favorable posture; knowing when to kiss the penis or the clitoris or simply gaze and admire and smile. Knowing when to grab and when to hold, when to move in and when to move back. When to increase the space of the thrusting in and out and when to slow down and only deliberately rubbing on the clitoris.
Knowing what your partner wants before your partner knows it. This type of knowing makes sex feel simultaneously safe and dreamy, healing and out-of-this-world-kind-of-feeling, and creates a deep intimate connection that allows movement to flow wordlessly. It requires tuning in completely to your partner’s emotional state and focusing on giving emotional pleasure along with the physical. You don’t have to ask how your partner wants it, whether what you’re doing feels good, or if it’s time for a bathroom break. You know. When both partners learn to read each other’s moods, lookout, sex is never the same again.
- Celebrate your partner’s body—every single inch of it. There’s a difference between touching for your pleasure and touching for your partner’s. There’s also a difference between a touch that asserts or assumes ownership and an appreciative touch that conveys gratitude for a gift. When you celebrate, you include. When you celebrate, you indulge. When you celebrate, you go slowly. When you celebrate, you revere. Trust me on this one, nothing is hotter than a reverent touch. The more deeply respectful you are, the more deeply you will move your partner and the more likely you are to move deeper still.
When was the last time you took the time to admire her hands or feet, massage his arms or shoulders, gently stroke her hair, or run your hands from his thighs to his toes? When you celebrate, you are patient. You don’t go right for the hotspots. You make the effort to warm things up. As you focus on areas you thought weren’t sexy, they suddenly become sexy and you may hear your partner say, “No one has ever touched me there that way before.” Touch that celebrates is magical and electric. You’ll feel the charge in the air. And before you start, be sure to remove your smoke detector’s battery because sparks will start flying.
- Please please and please connect hearts before parts. This is the foreplay that precedes foreplay, the coming together that precedes the coming together, because it’s the most important secret, and it’s easy to skip after mastering the other two. You can tune in and touch reverently, but if you forget to align yourself fully with your partner, to pause and remind each other with words, gestures, even a glance of the love you share, you’ll go through the motions of sex and end up feeling empty, you will never experience the pleasure line. When you feel, you’re drifting apart from your partner, it’s tempting to use sex to try to reconnect. But using intimacy to create connection is backwards. Connection creates intimacy, because connection presumes trust.
When you let your partner get close to you emotionally, you take your walls down and allow yourself to relax. This state of mental calmness has a tremendous effect on the body, priming it and making you intensely receptive. Your partner feels your energy and feeds on it, feels the hands of your mind before your touch, and when your fingers finally alight, you arouse feelings you’ve already awakened. But none of this happens if you don’t align your hearts first. The easiest way to get coordinated is to repeat a simple phrase together. Such as, “Horny, I married you and will remain here with you because I love you.” When you say these words in unison, the world around you melts away, and you’re ready to experience something unforgettable and you are already swimming in the pleasure line.
- Sex is not just a physical act in which both are engaged but it is an unspoken language or a way to express feelings with your moves. So, talk with one another, verbal and non verbal words create a pleasure line fast. Don’t get too excited and act in hush. Try and create the environment, talk to one another, make him/her comfortable and be comfortable first. The more you will talk, more you will palpate with yourself.
- I always admonish couples not to show off, especially when you want to prove a new style or new discovery. Nobody is interested in how wild and untamed you can be if what you learn or are about to give will make you lose sensitivity towards your spouse, it is not worth it.
- Whatever way it starts and going to end, always be relaxed and don’t get too serious. Talk and laugh. If you make a mistake and she/he notices it, just laugh it off together. Sex has funny positions and you end up making weird noises. It will not only create an intimacy between you but a unique unspoken bonding. The best way to deal with them is to laugh and keep going on!
- Reviving old memories, it is not necessary that you talk about only fond memories related to sex but you can talk about the best time of your life when you both are together. It will be as a cuddle session and will build a stronger bond.
- Watch out and feel sensations, vibes, lie on top of each other and feel the breathtaking sensation when both your skins are touching each other. Observe subtle signs that she/he is getting excited. These signs can easily be detected as shuddering, weird noises, sharp breaths and so on. I am sure you must be feeling that tickling or butterflies in your stomach, Goose bumps. I know you are getting horny now.
- Find out the part your partner can go crazy for or will demand over and again. Sex is a natural and a pleasurable process for married lovers. Like a woman’s body, man’s body also reacts differently on different points. You just need to focus and find out what they most enjoy. It can either be foreplay or sucking. Once you figure out, give your best in that.
- Go back again to your sweet-time-of-foreplay, when you have the gift of time, languishing in supersensory, soulful love-making can be a rhapsodic revelation and a relationship booster. With sensual sex, it’s not all about where you and your spouse are going, but the process that gets you there. When you slow down and attempt to keep your orgasm at bay, you’re more focused on exploring every inch of each other’s bodies and savouring your time together. The emotional benefits are long-lasting too.
Knowing that he cares enough to lavish his love on you for hours, and that you’re his number one priority, builds confidence and security. Your bond, in general, will be stronger because you’ve made the bedroom a place to enjoy each other – not just sexual, but a place where better life decisions are made due to the effect of sex on the mind and body. The effect of this kind of sex is that it helps to keep both partners sex-logged, full, fresh and satisfied.
- Don’t forget the light-speed sex, due to our day-to-day pressure and demands, sometimes, a quickie is highly recommended. This kind of sex is like an earthquake, an eruption and an internal unexplainable release. It gets one’s (especially the man) adrenaline rushing within a second and before you know it, it’s over in a flash, and leaves you extremely satisfied.
Initiating a quickie can be the ultimate compliment a wife can give to her husband because it does not only show how deeply she desires him, but a sign that understands that the sexual desire of her man is basically a matter of hormonal functions and regulations. It is also ‘ever-present.’ And this needs the physiological release. She is aware that when she maintains an enthusiastic sexual interaction in the marriage relationship, her husband feels more secure, ready to face anything and looks at life from a better perspective.
In addition, when he’s had a stressful day, a fast and furious romp really takes the edge off. Put simply, sometimes, guys want to take their time and just want to get their rocks off. When you can tell he’s in a horny, hasty mood, don’t bother fully undressing. All you need for a successful speedy sex is, ‘be prepared’. “It’s your best friend when you don’t have time to get completely warmed up.”
- Another handy style is show-off sex. Come to think of it, have you ever given it a thought that it would be easier to give a speech in the presence of a crowd of people than to help your wife reach orgasm first? Taking that plunge, it may be worth it. Experts say that watching a wife flow in the pleasure of orgasm is near the top of most men’s fantasy wish lists. But it’s not just a very personal peep show; it’s a chance for the wife to teach her husband exactly how she likes to be fondled, caressed and taken to the seventh heaven. Revealing to your husband how he can master your sexual areas is one of the most secretive and intimate things you can do together.
- There is what is called comfort sex. Anyone with a pulse would be unwise not to crave a hot and spicy sexual session. But sometimes, all you want is the sexual equivalent of let’s just have fun; it may not be exciting, but it makes you feel so good. Married lovers have sex for a lot of different reasons. One of the reasons is to be soothed and comforted. Making each other feel loved and cared for is the most powerful way to bring the psychological and physical elements of your relationship together. This type of sex is always recommended for couples facing one physical challenge or the other. In other words, sickness and physical challenges should not be strong enough to stop your sexual escapade.
- Another one is called untamed- territory sex. For couples celebrating their honeymoon right now, please, this is when you should go wild, go uncivilised with each other. Don’t try to tame your passion. Awaken the sexual giant in you. This sexual giant is the raw, primitive and rumble kind of sex that makes the bed spring make rhythmic sound, rattles bed frames, romps the sheets – the more writhing and bucking, the better.
This is the time you should practise all, go rear, go frontal, go down and make sure you do not leave any stone unturned. Let it be that when you make reference to the honeymoon experience, it would be with a satisfactory notion that you actually did justice to the time. Basically, because honeymoon is purely a celebration of sexuality, you are not permitted to be shy during this time for any reason. When you need more, just grab your husband’s hands and wrap them around your waist – a cue that you want him to hold on and thrust – and he’ll answer your call of the wild. Keep your neck down. It’ll help you loosen up all the way down your spine so you can have the best.
- Have you heard this- surrendered sex? Well, men generally are conquest-loving creatures, which is why they get so hot when their wives let them take over. If your husband feels like he’s at the top of his game, your surrendering is a power trip and huge turn-on. Wives, please, during foreplay, let your legs fall open and hold the headboard or pillows above you so your whole body is exposed to him. Then invite him to slide on top of you. Meet his thrusts halfway by rocking your pelvis upward against his and lifting your legs in the air with your feet spread far apart. This gives him room to manoeuvre his body and alternate between deep thrusting and short pumping. Then drape your legs over his shoulders so he can grab your ankles and position them where he wants them. Tell him you want him to assist you reach orgasm. It means you want him running the show because he has the skills to get you there.”
- The last but not the least is the domination sex style. Wives, gone are the days when you are only to be seen and not be heard. It is no longer the man’s world; it is our world. He’s been doing all the pouncing and pawing lately. At this point, you take the reins. But a truly titillating takeover has to be authentic and not staged. So, aggressively take over. This is the time. If you don’t, some other lady may and I am sure you don’t want that. All you just need to do is send him an SMS and say, “I’d love to be in charge tonight.” Then gently grab his organ and rub it around your G-spot as if you are so sure of what you are doing. He’ll happily submit to your sexy request. Have a wonderful weekend.
Got any more ideas or tips? Let me know by commenting below. 😉👍